A while back, I shared with you a personal story about my mother-in-law that impacted my relationship with my husband. She went through a major heart transplant surgery and we honestly weren’t prepared for some of the topics, challenges, and relationship issues we had to deal with. After all, relationships and marriage don’t come with a manual so we pretty much have to write our own. When experiences like this happen, we have to alter it as we go.

Now that she is in the recovery process, my husband is back home to live with me after being away for a while to take care of her. Reuniting with him feels great, but it’s also given us an opportunity to reflect on some of the open loops we left from disagreements we’ve had.

Close the Open Loops In Relationships

Reflecting together and under circumstances where we’re not stressed has been a game changer for our marriage.

As we were discussing some of those “open loops”, my husband asked me a question that challenged me as a wife. He asked, “Michelle, do you know what your responsibility as a wife is and what men want?”

I responded with the typical answer, “Support, love, and keep the house in order.”

He shook his head and said, “Of course all of those matters, but there is one thing men want from their wives. It is harmony. We look to you to bring harmony to the home and to the relationship.” 

Harmony’s Secret Power

Harmony…? To be frank, I’ve never thought of the power of harmony and the role it plays in our relationship until now.

The definition of harmony is two-fold. One is to produce chords to make a pleasing effect and the other definition is agreement, unity.

There is a popular saying in American and Latin American culture that goes something along the lines, “Happy Wife, Happy Life.” While I am not a fan of that saying, on this day, I understood what it really meant. 

We women are the conductors in our homes and relationships where we produce the chords that create agreement and unity.

We have the power to set the mood, the flow, and the tone for our family.  

Just notice… When you’re unhappy or upset, the “train” sort of starts to derail. Everyone in the home becomes unhappy, or begins to “act out” in other ways. On the other hand, when you’re happy, the home is better able to maintain peace. Whether you realize it or not, you play a big part in creating the sunshine in your home and relationships.

That’s the power you hold as a woman.